My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
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