Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
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