Did you ever notice that cashews look like fetuses?
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
Dignity is for republicans.
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
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