I am going to give you the keys to my place
Then I'll give you the keys to my heart
Gag me
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Randomize