Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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