so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Randomize
