Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
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