Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
I woke up this morning with "guy in polar bear j.crew boxers" written on my stomach along with a 5 digit phone number...
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
Randomize