All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
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