quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
Randomize
