I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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