i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
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