just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
we should paint friendship bongs
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
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