It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
Randomize
