The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
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