I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
Randomize
