where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
Randomize