we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
You dont lie about slip and slides
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
Randomize
