All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
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