hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
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