Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
Randomize
