You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
Well the nurse forgot to take all my stitches out, so my surgical tools are peroxide, kitchen scissors, fingernail clippers, a pocket knife, and 11 beers. Let's do this...
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
Randomize