Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
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