Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
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