Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.