Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
Randomize