Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.