Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
23 Insane Reasons People Got Fired
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
These 31 Gross People Really Put The ‘Trash’ In ‘Trashed’
Is it penis luge time yet?
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party