Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
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