He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
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