i wish there were pregnant emoticons
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
I love you. Go after that dick
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
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