so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
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