Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
Randomize