You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
I did not marry a roomba.
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