Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
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