Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
I seriously just forgot to push down the toaster twice in a row \n\nSo I've been waiting 8 minutes for toaster strudels that I haven't even started... Too high
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
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