THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Randomize