i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
New policy: when a woman uses the word blowjob in a sentence within 5 minutes of meeting her, you buy her a drink.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
We're going to shave my junk and take pictures of it wearing fake mustaches we found at the dollar store. They're uncannily realistic; much better than the cockstaches of my youth.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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