Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize
