no, he came in my armpit
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
It probably doesn't matter because I'm drunk...but I'm sorry for getting you drunk, having you almost lose your place to live, all your friends, permanently lose your liver functions, throwing up on my floor, losing virginity...etc...mostly I'm sorry for making you watch: cabin in the woods.
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
Randomize
