Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
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