Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
Randomize