That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
21 Ladies Reveal The Sexiest Thing A Man Can Do In A Public Setting
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
These 19 Underage Drinkers Epicly Got By With A Horrible Fake ID
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.