He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
i think i just lost a toe
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
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