idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Another f*ing night of vodka youporn and xanax. I need to get a goddamn life
3 great things that go great together... But not on a Friday night. Perfect on say... a Tuesday.
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
