Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IN THE MIDDLE OF HOOKING UP, HE IS CALLED AWAY ON AN "EMERGENCY". FUCK THAT, MATT'S CAR IS NOT AS URGENT AS MY THIRST.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
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