im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
Randomize
