hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
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I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
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Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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