ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize