Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Randomize
