somebody snuck up and got me drunk
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
Randomize
