matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
Randomize
